The following is a guest post by Hannah of tosharecareandlove.com
I was one of those kids who grew up in church. I knew all the songs by heart, went to Sunday School, and was living (and leading) a Christian life, but that didn’t save me.
My dad was a pastor, so I had always known about Jesus, and believed He existed. I accepted Jesus into my heart at the ripe old age of 7, and knew in my heart that He loved me, but it wasn’t until I was 13 that I truly started to understand what being a Christian was.
On Super Bowl XXIX Sunday, I woke up just completely and utterly distraught. God had spoke to me in a very real way that day. Although I don’t remember every single detail of that morning, I remember going into my parents bedroom crying. I mean, I was just completely weeping.
When they asked me what was wrong, I told them that I knew I wasn’t saved, and that I wanted to be. I wanted to follow Jesus wholeheartedly, and asked them to pray with me. Right there, on my parents bed, that sweet morning before church, I rededicated my life to Christ.
I am blessed to be surrounded by family and friends who were a great, Godly support system throughout my walk, but I still struggle.
Before I was in college, even though I loved Jesus, I struggled with relationships & low self-esteem because I wasn’t keeping Christ at the center of my focus. I was constantly in and out of relationships. When any relationship ended, it was usually very brutal. I always ended up feeling unloved and like I was some sort of “defect” and couldn’t understand why no one wanted me.
Little did I know then, that I was trying to fill a void in my heart where The Lord was meant to be. I wasn’t following Him wholeheartedly anymore and was trying to satisfy that deep longing to be loved through earthly relationships that inevitably failed me and left me wounded.
By choice, I remained single for a year. I still to this day believe that God intentionally made me feel “invisible” to men during that period because He wanted me to focus on Him instead of finding a husband. I wrestled with God about this for several months, because I didn’t like it.
I eventually stumbled upon a book at LifeWay that completely changed my life. It’s called “Get Lost : Your Guide To Finding True Love” by Dannah Gresh.
I read that book with the wrong motives from the start, but when I finished, I was completely changed. I found my True Love. I found Jesus. The One who had been there for me all along (and still is) just waiting for me to come running to Him. And come running, I did. I came running with bruises, scars, and a broken heart, and he picked up the pieces and put me back together.
I brought everything to the cross. All my baggage, all my pain, all my mistakes, all my wounds, all my despair, and I laid it at His feet. I am no longer trying to fill a void in my heart with relationships, I let it go and gave it to God.
He is enough. He satisfies. He is love. He doesn’t fail you.
Hannah is the blogger for www.tosharecareandlove.com who loves Jesus & is passionate about blogging to share her story of how Jesus changed her. She also enjoys being outdoors, music, & making friends! She is a native Texan, raised in Tennessee. She is a coffee addict and INFJ. If you want to follow along with her on social media, you can find her on: –Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, and Bloglovin‘.
